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Dayton Daily News, Wednesday, April 9, 2003
Local writer takes lighthearted look at dating after age 50 By Laura Dempsey Anita Richwine knew that by publishing a book about her experiences in the dating scene, she’d be treading on some sacred ground. As a mother and grandmother, she took some definite risks in writing Suddenly Alone: You’re 50-plus and Single Again. Now What? “I have daughters and granddaughters!” Richwine said. “I worried about what they’d think of the book. They’re great girls, and said, ‘You’re a wonderful writer,’ and on and on…I waited for the other shoe to drop. “One daughter said she didn’t think the book would have those kinds of adventures, involving dating and relationships,” Richwine recalled. Richwine’s book was written in the wake of her divorce and subsequent plunge into the single scene. To her surprise, she found her situation wasn’t all that rare, and when she and her friends began comparing stories, she found some truly ripe pickings. “I noticed these bizarre happenings here in my circle of single friends, and I thought I’d better start taking notes,” she said. “The book also deals with aging, but it’s not clinically researched. It’s all anecdotal – I emphasize that it’s anecdotal, and hope that people will get a few laughs.” Richwine hopes, too, that people will gain a little strength from the experiences chronicled in her book. “Maybe I made mistakes, and I admit them,” she said. “I stumbled along the way, and thought that others may learn, they may be able to avoid the pitfalls.” When the book was complete, Richwine tried the normal routes to publishing. “In 1995, I had a manuscript I could present. I gave it to 20 or 30 editors and agents who gave some good suggestions that I used in developing the second and third version. I made it longer, added dialogue.” Richwine attended the University of Dayton’s humor-writing workshop, named for Erma Bombeck and held every other year. It was there that she explored the idea of self-publishing the book. She decided on 1stBooks Library, a print-on-demand publishing company that has helped more than 7,000 authors. “Some of me wishes it could have gone the other way,” she said. “But this is my first book, and I wanted to get it out there. Who knows what might happen?” “I’ve been in the area for a long time,” she said, adding that she keeps her true age a closely guarded secret. “People knew me, and I knew that locally, at least, that could help to sell some books.” Suddenly Alone takes a decidedly light look at romance – a serious subject that doesn’t get any easier with experience. “There are different circumstances that happen to this age group and our younger sisters,” she said. “There’s a difficulty in meeting eligible men, and that’s difficult for all ages.” She has yet to find her own “midlife magic,” but isn’t about to give up either hope or the hunt. “I believe it’s out there, it could be a relationship, remarrying – whatever it is. Maybe I’d better reread my book on how to meet men!” she laughed. “The two biggest questions people have are how to meet men, and this: In every breakup there’s a man and a woman. Where are all the men? “I tell people they’re off scampering after 20- and 30-year-olds in tube tops and miniskirts, at first anyway. Just be patient, and there could be something decent in the worn-out residue.” Richwine is at work on a second book, encouraged by her experience with Suddenly Alone. The response has been good,” she said. “I think I presented it exactly as it was. I’m encouraged by the numbers of women who’ve called me, saying I hit it exactly right.” Contact Laura Dempsey at 225-2403 or ldempsey@coxohio.com.
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